True repentance

 

Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.  --Proverbs 28:13

In 1985 Laura Joffe Numeroff published the story "If you give a mouse a cookie."  

If you give a mouse a cookie, he’s going to ask for a glass of milk. When you give him the milk, he’ll probably ask you for a straw. When he’s finished, he’ll ask you for a napkin.

Then he’ll want to look in a mirror to make sure he doesn’t have a milk mustache.

When he looks in the mirror, he might notice his hair needs a trim. So he’ll probably ask for a pair of nail scissors.

When he’s finished giving himself a trim, he’ll want a broom to sweep it up. He’ll start sweeping. He might get carried away and sweep every room in the house. He may even end up washing the floors as well!

When he’s done, he’ll probably want to take a nap. You’ll have to fix up a little box for him with a blanket and a pillow. He’ll crawl in, make himself comfortable and fluff the pillow a few times. He’ll probably ask you to read him a story.

So you’ll read to him from one of your books, and he’ll ask to see the pictures. When he looks at the pictures, he’ll get so excited he’ll want to draw one of his own.

He’ll ask for paper and crayons. He’ll draw a picture. When the picture is finished, he’ll want to sign his name with a pen. Then he’ll want to hang his picture on your refrigerator. Which means he’ll need Scotch tape. He’ll hang up his drawing and stand back to look at it.

Looking at the refrigerator will remind him that he’s thirsty. So… he’ll ask for a glass of milk. And chances are if he asks you for a glass of milk, he’s going to want a cookie to go with it.

 The hubris comes full circle.  The story is an illustration of an old adage, "If you give him an inch, he will take a mile." That quote had its origin from a quote by John Heywood in 1546, "For when I gave you an inch, you took an ell." In this context, an ell was a measurement of cloth measuring about 45 inches. The proverb highlights the tendency of people to take more and more liberties, instead of being happy with what they were given.

In Scripture, we see this illustrated in the life of David.  Starting in 2 Samuel 11, we read about hubris in the life of the king.  In the spring of the year, the story starts, the time when Kings go out to battle, David was at home, having sent his general Joab and all of the men with him to make war against the Ammonites.  Bored, David was on the roof of his house when he saw a woman through a window of the house next door.  The woman, called Bathsheba (or bat-seba, meaning "daughter of an oath" in Hebrew) bathing in her home.

David was aroused and asked who she was.  When he was told that she was the wife of Uriah the Hittite, and knowing that Uriah was out on the battlefield with Joab, David sent for her.  Hardly in a position to refuse the king, Bathsheba showed up at the king's residence and was ushered immediately to his bedchamber.  David had relations with her, and then sent her home.  Later she sent word to David that she was with child, and David compounded his sin.

The king sent for Uriah, and asked him how the battle was going.  Uriah gave the news from the front lines, then encamped at David's doorstep.  When David asked why he didn't go home to his wife, Uriah answered that his comrades-in-arms were not able to come home to their wives, so why should he?  David tried again, getting Uriah drunk and sending him home.  Again, Uriah proved himself more faithful than the king.  David had no choice but to order Uriah's death in battle, but in an ironic twist, the orders were written and sealed, and given to Uriah to deliver to Joab himself.

Once Uriah was dispatched, David took the grieving widow into his harem, where she delivered a son.  "But the thing that David had done," the Scripture says, "displeased the Lord."  God sent Nathan the prophet to accuse David of his crimes--voyeurism, adultery, rape; lying, treason (because he deprived Israel of one of its best warriors, thus giving aid and comfort to the enemy), and finally, murder.

Nathan went on to accuse David of despising God.   2 Samuel 12:9-10 says, "Why have you despised the word of the Lord, to do what is evil in His sight?  You have struck down Uriah the Hittite with the sword and have taken his wife to be your wife and have killed him with the sword of the Ammonites.  Now therefore the sword shall never depart from your house, because you have despised Me and have taken the wife of Uriah to be your wife."

Note the use of the word despised in both verses 9 and 10.  In the first instance David despises the word (the law) of the Lord.  In the second instance, God, speaking through Nathan, says, "You have despised Me."  We see from this that sin is a despising of the law of God.  But we also see that to despise God's law is to despise Him.  Now, it is easy for us to think that David's sin truly was grievous and fail to grasp the application of Nathan's words to ourselves.  But as we have already seen, all sin, whether large or small in our own eyes, is against God.  Therefore, when I indulge in any of the so-called acceptable sins, I am not only despising God's law but, at the same time, I am despising God Himself.  --Jerry Bridges, Respectable Sins (2007).

Sin is likened to a cancer.

Another term for cancer is malignancy.  Medically, the word malignant describes a tumor of potentially unlimited growth that expands locally into adjoining tissue by invasion and systematically by metastasizing into other areas of the body.  Left alone, a malignancy tends to infiltrate and metastasize throughout the entire body and will eventually cause death.  No wonder cancer and malignant are such dreaded words.  Sin is a spiritual and moral malignancy.  Left unchecked, it can spread throughout our entire inner being and contaminate every area of our lives.  Even worse, it will often "metastasize" from us into the lives of other believers around us.  --ibid,

In the 2000 movie Remember the Titans, football player Julius tells outside linebacker (and captain of the squad) Gary, "Attitude reflects leadership, Captain." In David's case, the cancer of sin led from lust to adultery, and from adultery to murder.  The sin was not limited to David alone, as he ordered Joab to be complicit in the cover-up.  As a result, Nathan prophesied that: 1) the sword would never depart from his house; 2) David's wives will be given to another, who would sleep with them openly; and 3) the child born of this unholy tryst would die.

Fortunately, unlike his predecessor King Saul, David offered true repentance.  He confessed his sin openly.  2 Samuel 12:13 says, "David said to Nathan, 'I have sinned against the Lord.'  And Nathan said to David, 'The Lord also has put away your sin; you shall not die'."  God showed David forgiveness because of his confession and repentance, but there would still be consequences to the sin.  David showed contrition and concern for others affected by his sin when the child born to Bathsheba became sick.  David fasted and prayed for 7 days.  God heard his prayers, but did not spare the child.  The child died, but God blessed David and Bathsheba with another son, Solomon, who would go on to rule Israel after David's death.

We can read about David's confession and repentance in Psalm 51.  One of the most beautiful passages in Scripture shows David (and us) how repentance works.

Appealing to God's mercy

Psalm 51:1 says, "Have mercy on me, O God, according to Your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions."  God is holy; we are not.  Romans 3:23 reminds us, "All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."  When we fall short, it is important that we acknowledge God.  It's all about him, not about us.  Isaiah 43:25 says, "I, I am He who blots out your transgressions for My own sake, and I will not remember your sins."  The NIV translates this as, "I will remember your sins no more".  God is sovereign and unchanging.  He will not hold our sins against us if we confess and repent.

Isaiah 44:22 says, "I have blotted out your transgressions like a cloud and your sins like a mist; return to me, for I have redeemed you."  And in Acts 3:19 we read, "Repent therefore, and turn back, that your sins may be blotted out."  We as Christians know that Jesus bore the penalty for all our sins.  Colossians 2:13-14 says, "And you, who were dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with Him, having forgiven us all our trespasses, by cancelling the record of debt that stood against us with is legal demands. This He set aside, nailing it to the cross."

Acknowledging our sin

God cannot abide sin.  He is holy, and will not allow sin in His presence.  We, therefore, need to be cleansed of all sin.  In Psalm 51:2 we hear David's cry, "Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin."

How can we approach a holy God when we have acknowledged that our hands are not clean?  We need an intercessory, an intermediary, one who can stand up for us and plead our case before God.  Who can this be?  In Old Testament times it was a priest, who would offer up sacrifices for the sins of the people.  This was an imperfect system, because the priest himself was sinful and unholy.

God foresaw this problem.  In Malachi 3:1-3 we read, "Behold, I send my messenger, and he will prepare the way before me.  And the Lord whom you seek will suddenly come to His temple; and the messenger of the covenant in whom you delight, behold, he is coming, says the Lord of hosts.  But who can endure the day of his coming, and who can stand when he appears?  For he is like a refiner's fire and like fullers' soap.  He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver, and he will purify the sons of Levi and refine them like gold and silver, and they will bring offerings in righteousness to the Lord."

Hebrews 9:13-14 says, "For if the blood of goats and bulls, and the sprinkling of defiled persons with the ashes of a heifer sanctify for the purification of the flesh, how much more will the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered Himself without blemish to God, purify our conscience from dead works to serve the living God."  And 1 John 1:7, 9 says, "But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin.  If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."

Admitting that all sin is an affront to God

Psalm 51:4 say, "Against You, You only, have I sinned and done what is evil in Your sight."  David had acted selfishly, as we all do when we choose to sin.  Nathan reminded David that to willfully sin is to despise God's law, and by extension to despise God Himself.  Other people may have been caught up in our sinfulness, and we should make amends to them as we can.  But the most important relationship to work on was not with the woman who was impregnated and subsequently widowed, although we can all agree she was a victim.  It was not with the subordinate who carried out the orders to kill the husband, although Joab was certainly a partner in crime here.  It was not even with Uriah or with the unnamed child who lost their lives as a result of this soap opera.

The most important relationship to re-establish was with God, our creator, and with Jesus, who is the author and finisher of our faith (Hebrews 12:2).  1 Corinthians 8:12 says, "Thus, sinning against your brothers and wounding their conscience when it is weak, you sin against Christ."  Yes, we should make amends with our brother, but not before confessing and repenting before God.

Affirming that God can make us clean

In Psalm 51:3 David laments that "my sin is ever before me."  He may have had nightmares.  He may have been reminded of Uriah every time he looked at Bathsheba.  He may have later thought of the lost child every time he saw Solomon.  This is why in Psalm 51:7 David pleads with God, "Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me and I shall be whiter than snow."

Isaiah 1:18 says, "Come now, let us reason together, says the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool."  Through the shed blood of Christ we have a restored and renewed relationship with a holy God.

It comes full circle.  In the children's story where the mouse was given a cookie, but he desired so much more; in the end, after demanding so many other accommodations, he realized all he wanted was the cookie.  In the same way, God has given us a relationship with himself.  When we selfishly go after other pursuits, we end up realizing that all we need is the relationship with God.  

This is true repentance.